Um, so can anyone loan me some money? I'm probably going to need at least...$5,000. Yeah, that should do it. Man, you know I'm good for it!
C'mon guys! How often is that you get to be a PART OF HISTORY? And not some lame chapter of history, with old dead guys and boring trade negotiations. The HOT MESS part of history, the kind where everyone involved should have known better! You know those bystanders, sadly shaking their heads from the sidelines? That could be you!!! A part of you has always wanted this, buried deep in the darkest tangles of your mind. You know this is true.
So please forward all donations as soon as possible. I want to seal this up quickly...you understand, of course.
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