by Jillian Butler, Ampersandology
About a year ago, my heart began to swell with civic pride. Maple syrup Don Cherry what's it all aboot, eh, said I. And I'll be honest, this swell basically coincided with the 2010 Olympics, like many in my native land. O Canada, people! We have healthcare, yo. A chicken in ev'ry pot and a double double besides, yeahyeah. During this swell, many strange things happened: I bought history books! I gave money to the CBC! And I crowned my own personal Queen of the Canadias.
So in conclusion, everyone should respect Canada. I proudly present our queen. Our girl, she likes to party all the time, party ALL the time. I brought some royal footage, too! My motto is always be prepared, not unlike the Boy Scouts.
Of America.
Oh, whatever. We have them too.
Presenting....
Some people may disagree with my placement of our (un)official sovereign, since we already kinda have an official one, but to them, I simply say this party is gonna get raw like sushi, so haters to the left. Um, and Ms. Atwood? With all due respect, please continue being adorable 24/7.
I wish Robertson Davies gave ME hockey advice. I feel like it might make me care somehow about the sport. One of these days, I'm pretty sure they're going to revoke my passport because I just found out what a hat trick was.*
*it was used as a sex joke. Yeah. So. Being Canadian is so fun.
About a year ago, my heart began to swell with civic pride. Maple syrup Don Cherry what's it all aboot, eh, said I. And I'll be honest, this swell basically coincided with the 2010 Olympics, like many in my native land. O Canada, people! We have healthcare, yo. A chicken in ev'ry pot and a double double besides, yeahyeah. During this swell, many strange things happened: I bought history books! I gave money to the CBC! And I crowned my own personal Queen of the Canadias.
So in conclusion, everyone should respect Canada. I proudly present our queen. Our girl, she likes to party all the time, party ALL the time. I brought some royal footage, too! My motto is always be prepared, not unlike the Boy Scouts.
Of America.
Oh, whatever. We have them too.
Presenting....
Some people may disagree with my placement of our (un)official sovereign, since we already kinda have an official one, but to them, I simply say this party is gonna get raw like sushi, so haters to the left. Um, and Ms. Atwood? With all due respect, please continue being adorable 24/7.
I wish Robertson Davies gave ME hockey advice. I feel like it might make me care somehow about the sport. One of these days, I'm pretty sure they're going to revoke my passport because I just found out what a hat trick was.*
*it was used as a sex joke. Yeah. So. Being Canadian is so fun.
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